steampunksteampunk

steampunktendencies:

"Impressive-Looking Gothic Castle in Connecticut Can Be Yours for $45 Million

Gothic castles aren’t commonplace in America, so this impressive real-life Hogwarts in Woodstock, Connecticut, definitely stands out. ‘Chrismark Castle’ is only a decade old but with its moat and turrets, it has all the markings of a genuine medieval castle.

Chrismark Castle presents itself as a perfectly preserved medieval structure on the outside, with all sorts of modern amenities and technology concealed on the inside. It stands on a 354-acre property, encompassing 22,000 square ft. and consists of a massive lower-level garage, eight bedrooms, ten bathrooms, 12 fireplaces, a maid’s room, a library, a pool, and several massage rooms.

The star of the castle’s opulent interiors is perhaps the 1,200 square ft. circular kitchen – it has windows all around the walls, offering a 180-degree view of Lake Porter. The dining room spells grandeur as well – it has a unique ceiling design and can accommodate a huge dinner party. The master bedroom also offers gorgeous views of the grounds, and the granite-fitted master bathroom has its own whirlpool. All the doors in the castle are custom-fit and handmade, as are the hardwood floors.”

(View & Learn more : Oddity Central)

hothotphone
hothotphone:

"Coasters"

“Wow, you sure have a lot of coasters.”
“I know, right? Gotta protect your surfaces.”
“Since you brought it up, where are your tables?”

“Sold them. Needed money for the coasters.”
“Then where do you put your glasses down?”
“Don’t have any glasses. Sold them to buy more coasters.”
“So what do you use the coasters for?”
“To start conversations.”
“How do you end the conversations?”
“Haven’t gotten that far yet. Hey, check out my coasters.”
“Wow, you sure have a lot of coasters.”

[Keaton Patti is a writer and comedian living in New York City. You may remember him from the previous sentence.]

hothotphone:

"Coasters"

“Wow, you sure have a lot of coasters.”

“I know, right? Gotta protect your surfaces.”

“Since you brought it up, where are your tables?”

“Sold them. Needed money for the coasters.”

“Then where do you put your glasses down?”

“Don’t have any glasses. Sold them to buy more coasters.”

“So what do you use the coasters for?”

“To start conversations.”

“How do you end the conversations?”

“Haven’t gotten that far yet. Hey, check out my coasters.”

“Wow, you sure have a lot of coasters.”

[Keaton Patti is a writer and comedian living in New York City. You may remember him from the previous sentence.]